Please take a look at some of my favorite posts! My prayer is that you will be encouraged in some small way by what you read here.
What if we took off the “I’m fine” mask to expose the pain that keeps us up at night, haunts us like nightmares, and threatens each breath. We struggle to reach the surface to gain a breath, arms thrashing under heavy burden waters, heart pounding, breath held tight.
… but we’re fine.
Could we take off the mask that we, especially as Christians, live the “fairy tale”? We are certainly blessed, in every circumstance guarded by the Father, but honestly, in the deepest pit, we aren’t fine.
I’m not fine.
If I took off the “I’m fine” mask, would you think less of me, or would you think I’m …. human?
“Don’t start the ride!” I yelled as I ran to find my four-year-old son. Somehow we had been separated while boarding the rollercoaster. My heart pounded as I frantically looked for him in the dark, with only the lights of the park to help me see.
“Wait! Wait! He’s not buckled in yet, and he’s too little! He will fall out!” I ran through other passengers, tripping over feet and legs until I reached my son. My hands shook as I hurriedly buckled the safety belt tight and told him to hang on. Once he was secure, I started back to find my seat.
The ride started to move.
I am a strict mom.
It’s not because I want to take fun things away from my children or make their lives as boring as possible. I know I can’t “protect them from everything” as I’ve been told. I realize that.
But I will protect them from as much as I can, for as long as I can, while I teach them how to make good decisions…
As I told my son,
- if a pack of wild dogs attacked him, I would jump in and fight with every ounce of strength in my body
- if a bear started chasing him, this “Mama Bear” would stand in the middle and challenge any attack
- if a burgler broke into our house, I would protect my children at any cost
- if the enemy of their souls attacks them (and he will), I will surround them with prayer and protect them through rules for as long as possible
“I dreamed about him last night“, she tells me, leaning close with a sparkle in her eye.
“I dreamed that it was morning, and we were still in bed. I turned to face him and whispered that I was tired. I wanted to just stay in bed with our arms around each other and rest. He said he thought that was a good idea“.
“I pray sometimes that I will dream of him” she tells me, closing her eyes to see the dream again.
The lump in my throat tightens as she smiles. A simple moment, captured in a dream. One I live daily, and take for granted… Strong arms had held her for sixty years, through children, grandchildren, richer and poorer, sickness and health. Those arms are here no more, except in spirit. Her best friend and love is finally Home with the Father, and is only a precious memory.
And sometimes he visits in dreams…
I have loved “The Price is Right” for as long as I can remember. I used to dream of being a contestant on “The Price is Right”, and I would imagine winning all sorts of fabulous prizes like an exotic vacation, or a camper, or even — a computer! (Hey, this was back in the day when most families did not have a computer, and if you did, it was so big that it took up half the room… )
I was watching “The Price is Right” the other day and realized that we can actually learn some valuable lessons from that show, besides the price of denture cream.
“But He was wounded for our transgressions,
He was bruised for our iniquities;
The chastisement for our peace was upon Him,
And by His stripes we are healed.” ~ Isaiah 53:5
I read about the Man who touched blind eyes and made them see — His face first! I am amazed that He can calm the sea and even walk across the water. I love to embrace Him who is able to see my deepest need, become a friend to sinners, and show compassion to those who desparately hate Him. My heart sings on Resurrection Day when the promise of eternal life is given, even to me!
But when it comes to the deadly wounding, I get uneasy.
Wounds make me want to run away.
Do you ever have days when you are spent? Today I am feeling emotionally and physically exhausted due to my youngest being up in the middle of the night with a stomach virus, along with trying to catch up at work from being on vacation over the holidays. It seems like today has been failure upon failure…
As I left for work this morning, my little one was crying for Mama and stretching out his little arms for me…. I wanted nothing more than to take him in my arms, but I had to leave him with my husband who was graciously babysitting our sick baby.
I forgot to tell my oldest son goodbye after his school program, and he was so distraught that his teacher called me on my cell phone so that he could talk to me. (Thank you, Lord, for this wonderful, godly teacher who understands and is patient with my son).
Today is not my “Mom of the Year” award day.
I got in an argument with my husband.
Yep, sure did. I said it.